Coca Cola’s History is Mad

There really is nothing more annoying

…than doing a little video, like this one, and then realising, subsequent to the bother of filming it, that you’ve failed to include what is probably its most pertinent fact.

So I’m in Corsica, loafing at a beach bar, and I begin cogitating on the origins of the world’s favourite soft drink (two billion servings a day…).

An hour is lost to Wikipedia and the script – for this video’s yammerings – is made. Though, you see, what I egregiously missed out is that

THE ORIGIN STORY OF COCA-COLA BEGINS IN CORSICA.

In 1863 – 23 years before Coca-Cola was invented – a pharmacist in Bastia called Angelo Mariani decided to macerate Peruvian coca leaves in Corsican white wine.

Cocaine-rich Vin Mariani – aka Coca Mariani – was recommended as a treatment for melancholy, impotence and exhaustion among children and the elderly.

(Doesn’t the idea of grampa getting unwittingly blasted on liquid chisel make you smile?)

Anyway, it was a riproaring success and eventually made it to New York. With success came copycats. At least twenty in the US, including ‘French Wine Coca’, created by John Pemberton.

The same year, under pressure from the temperance movement, Pemberton replaced the wine with oils, sugar and citric acid, mixing it with soda water. Coca-Cola was born.

So, yeah, OG Vin Mariani is Coca-Cola’s naughty Corsican grandad. And, to my delight, this storied tonic wine has recently been relaunched (alas, minus the cocaine).

But none of this is in the video. I found out too late. So the whole cursed thing is ruined. In fact, I wouldn’t even bother watching it.

I do strongly suggest, however, that you try Vin Mariani. My melancholy, impotence and exhaustion are gone!