French VS English Men | Tatty Macleod

Comedian Tatty Macleod on the difference between French and English men.

Filmed at the Funny Women Awards 2022.

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[Music] hello how are we doing women love it fantastic very good my name’s Tatty a little bit about me to kick us off I have got three sisters I’m one of four girls anyone else okay one person good this is relatable it’s um it’s no it’s important it’s the thing right when when you want to fall girls you always get the same reactions when you tell people right they always go oh my God four girls oh my God oh my God your Poor Dad oh my God you you Poor Dad how did he cope with having four girls how did your dad cope with having four girls but I would tell you how he coped right this is what my dad did a little top tip for you here aren’t you right okay so listening yeah my dad left and it is uh it’s very effective it’s uh you’re welcome okay what else about me I moved to England 15 years ago yeah yeah I did I moved it I moved from France hello so okay love you some support in the room very nice it was um it was difficult moving to England you know because obviously it’s a very different country and you had to adapt very quickly in particular I had to adapt to um uh uh English men which is very the thing I got used to French men I had to get used to Englishmen and Frenchmen and Englishmen are very different chalk and cheese baguette and pork pie very different kettle of I mean everything everything is different dating different even something as simple like a booty call right we all had a booty call in this room yeah very nice of course we have London ladies Thursday night a few calls happening this evening I’m sure everyone here has had a booty call right a bootical very perfunctory thing you know 4am want to have sex send a text message very perfunctory thing a French Man Booty calling you is a work of art okay this is what a French man will send you at 4am when he wants to have sex so go like this he’ll go hahaha hello I know it is late but I am thinking of you tonight I feel very close to the Moon we are both alone are you alone too bye luck a late night walk has brought me to the foot of your apartment open the door is that we have a moment together Elizabeth alone in a world that is so cool that is what a French man will send you at 4am when he wants to have sex next with you this is the text message he is sending at 4am what you up to aubergine [Laughter] to the point and Englishman they get they get a bit offended when I say that they’re like come on we’re not that useless come on it’s a bit harsh it’s a bit harsh look don’t get me wrong there are things I love about Englishmen for example right get this okay I have never had disappointing sex with an Englishman now I have had some terrible sex with English men but it was never a surprise I wasn’t disappointed you know we got in there you couldn’t undo my bra strap I thought I’m in for a rough ride and not in a good way do you know what I mean like I just I wasn’t surprised it wasn’t a disappointment I have always had disappointing sex with Frenchmen and again now I’ve had some good sex with French men but it does not live up to the sales pitch because when you get in there and he’s like is this this is going to be the best sex of your life they call me sex good since I was 11. my ex-girlfriends she adds so many orgasms she died then you get to it and he’s like good night you’re like I’m so that is not what I paid for come on very different there is there is okay but I give the French this right there is a finesse to the French you’ve got to give them credit there’s a finesse like in France right they have something called an amuse Bush if you’ve been to a Posh Restaurant you’ve had that it’s basically like an appetizer a palette cleanser it’s called an emu’s bush literally translates as entertainment for the mouth now if the English made something called entertainment for the mouth it would be a [ __ ] like as a dildo with that name on it like that is what we saying finesse that’s a big difference and the other thing right and and this is this is something I’ve really noticed we even insult each other differently like the English people the way they insult the French they really they get really into it they’re like yeah yeah frogs Yeah frog frog froggy froggy yeah with you with your baguette yeah forget this that frog right very fro but English people [ __ ] love French stuff you know you love French food love going there on holiday love dropping French words in conversation give a little je ne Sequoia yeah we do yeah we do now let me tell you French people they are not doing that okay that’s not you’re not going to hear a French person be like hey good mix they’re not talking like that over there the way that French people insult the English it’s much more subtle okay and I and I tell you this is a great example of it okay English person you love the French you’re called a Francophile and it’s a really lovely word because Pharaoh comes in the Greek philos and it means love and you can put it on any country Francophile if you love France anglo-farl if you love The English Americano follow if you love Americans really International same word in French in the French dictionary it’s defined as France someone who loves France and the French lovely very nice if you look up a non-glo feel in the French dictionary same word it’s defined as someone who has sympathy for the English and that’s in a nutshell my friends is our relationship you have been gorgeous thank you so much I’ve been tattooed myself [Applause] [Music]