The National Writers Series is excited to host Erin French, owner and chef of the Lost Kitchen in Freedom, Maine. She also plays a starring role in Magnolia Network’s The Lost Kitchen, now in its third season. Her famous farm-to-table restaurant was named one of Time magazine’s “World’s Greatest Places” and selected by Bloomberg as one of “12 Restaurants Worth Traveling Across the World to Experience”
Erin is visiting Traverse City to talk about” Big Heart Little Stove.” It includes 75 recipes, your new go-to inspiration for creating thoughtful, meaningful, and refreshingly simple meals. But it’s more than just a cookbook, describing tips and tricks that Erin has used in her own dining room. A wonderful Christmas gift for you or your favorite cook! She previously published Finding Freedom, her New York Times bestselling memoir, and The Lost Kitchen, a gorgeous, four-season look at cooking in Maine.
Erin French is a born-and-raised native of Freedom, Maine, home of the Lost Kitchen and where she learned early the simple pleasures of thoughtful food and the importance of gathering for a meal. Her love of sharing Maine and its delicious heritage with curious dinner guests and new friends alike has been lauded by such outlets such as The New York Times, Martha Stewart Living, NPR’s All Things Considered, The Chew, CBS This Morning, The Today Show, Wall Street Journal, Boston Globe, and Food & Wine.
Live from downtown Traverse City by the shore of Lake Michigan this is the national writer series located in the lower Northwestern part of the state the region has a robust Arts culture beautiful scenery and of course dedicated Book Lovers hosting more than 250 authors in 13 years n WS recently
Welcomed best-selling novelists Ruth wear Geraldine Brooks and and Patch it the national writer series couldn’t do this without you I love NWS please welcome NWS co-founders an Stanton and Doug Stanton a number one New York Times bestselling author to introduce tonight’s event good evening everyone wow did you bring your appetites
We have quite a show for you it’s going to be a thrill thank you good evening my name is um Doug Stanton and um welcome to the Travers City Opera House in Travers City Michigan on Front Street by the shore of Lake Michigan our hometown it’s a wonderful place isn’t
It we have people tonight live streaming from all over the US the in Michelin restaurants in uh in Manhattan in diners in Wyoming in truck s in Ohio so we welcome all of you and we welcome you here in this packed house it’s so nice to get together and talk about food and
Company so of course we are honored to to have Aon French here owner of the Lost kitchen [Applause] she so exciting uh she is here to talk about her her new book her beautiful new cookbook with uh Traverse magazine editor Cara McDonald her book bigart little stove has a lot of heart I’ve
Enjoyed reading it all weekend um in it she encourages people to start small and not worry about making mistakes good advice for me she says at the end of the day what matters most is you showed up for yourself and for your guest and she really means it she does
Um before we start the show I want to say a few things just uh express some gratitude this building has stood on this s this site spanning three centuries if you think about 1892 um it’s yes that we’re so lucky to have it and welcome to Chad Lindsay the
New executive director however though it’s we’re sitting on lands that were uh maintained for Generations by indigenous people of this area so to the a shabi people we are in your debt and we thank you for [Applause] that I’m also uh thankful to the sponsors and donors who made this
Possible some of them are you may have seen them earlier too the green brick Foundation North guard technology West Shore Bank uh northwest Michigan arts and culture Network Travers City tourism and the Traverse City record Eagle our major media sponsor and an award-winning important Hometown newspaper let’s give a hand for them as
[Applause] well great and a special shout out tonight to our sponsors of this evening the folks at farm club they just were able to meet um backstage with our guest tonight we’re very grateful for their support and I know that you love that place too so thank you farm
Club and gave me a lot to say tonight I knew what kind of day I was going to have so here we go thanks to all of our donors large and small I would do want to say thank you to the Beerman and Janice families Roa bump who’s in the
Audience tonight so nice to see Roa she and her late husband David were early supporters thank you Roa and David and the bump family and our late board member Bob Giles late of the nean foundation at Harvard who brought so many great guests to our stage here um
And Janet wolf as well the event was made possible in part by the National Endowment for the Arts and the Michigan arts and culture Council our volunteers and our staff are scattered around this wonderful warm darkened room but without them we couldn’t do any of this we mean
That from the bottom of our heart so thank you and the proceeds that you take from your wallet and give to the opera house and the writer series go to our raing raising writers programs which is incredibly important to what we do so thank you nice job Doug thank
You now I shall say my two paragraphs um a few remarks about tonight’s event um if you have a question for Aon Aaron please write it down on the note card that you were given uh the ushers are going to pick them up in about 10 minutes into the
Conversation so be ready and for those of you who are live streaming please uh submit your questions online we won’t get them to them all but we’ll do our best and then after our event instead of a book signing well first of all all the books are signed that you’re holding but
If you’d also like to get a photo with Aaron there’s going to be a photo line and um so volunteers are going to make it go licky split and please do your part to do the same because Aaron and her husband Michael have to get on the
Plane tomorrow at 5:00 a.m. and they left they got up at 3:30 this morning so have a heart um they’re flying on a Cherry Capital airport uh with cherry Republic treats in hand thank you Cherry Republic Cherry Capital airports our official airport they have our banner up there
And um and now Doug will introd do the introductions for Cara and Aaron that was kind of the Amo Bo of the evening now we’re on to the main course and that I want to start with car McDonald she is a wonderful audition to our community she’s moved back here from
Colorado recently and as many of you know her as a writer and the executive editor of mynorth.com and Traverse Northern Michigan’s magazine and also one of our wonderful media sponsors she’s a veteran editor of uh magazines and she happily navigates dinnertime based on seasonal produce and hosts the
Weekly Local eats show on 9 and 10 News she found inspiration in aon’s work when her friend gave her a copy of aon’s book Finding Freedom a memoir which is for sale out in the lobby very different than the book you have in your hand so I
Suggest you take a look at that too and it came to Cara at a nice time because Cara was in sech of a story about creativity uh survival and renewal and that book had it all she lives in Travers City uh with her family now Aaron French we’re so happy to have her
Um I think if we clap loud enough tonight she’ll come back with her husband Michael and pay us a longer visit um but we’re going to really enjoy this evening with um with her as you may know her from the Lost kitchen a 40 seat restaurant in Freedom Maine that was
Recently named one of time magazines world’s greatest places that’s no small achievement and 12 restaurants worth traveling across the world to experience you only had to come across town so here you go she’s the author of the bestselling Memoir finding Freedom which was Cara’s favorite and features in Magnolia
Networks the Lost kitchen she was born and raised in Maine and learned early The Simple Pleasures of thoughtful food and the importance of gathering for a meal or a conversation like we’re having this evening her love of sharing Maine with curious dinner guests and new friends alike has been lauded by the
Outlets such as the times Martha Stewart Living NPR’s All Things Considered CBS This Morning in the Today Show and so on so tonight we have a special treat um Michael Dunton is going to be coming on stage to introduce a video um Michael is a recovering New Yorker
Uh he said that those are his words uh his career um took him into the depths of the media content Universe through such Main Stays as MTV networks and the Associated Press but in two 2013 while still at the AP Michael met Aon online and with a wink of an eye his journey
North from Manhattan to Maine began today Michael is Aon French’s husband and partner over the last decade he has chopped wood made fires put out fires tended to chickens occasionally cleaned ouses Yes you heard that right and generally supported the growth and momentum of the Lost kitchen he is also
Executive producer of The Lost kitchen TV show and manages all the media strategy and public relations for Aaron and the lost kitchen please join me in giving Michael a warm travor City [Applause] welcome thank you thank you thank you thank you Doug and an wow um
So am Mo Bo is funny but at the Lost kitchen am Mo Bo is like the fifth course um and you know um Aaron would tell you that every good entree she when you get to the Lost kitchen there are only four things on the menu but you end up eating 14 things
And a lot of them are unannounced and I’m one of those unannounced things you can consider me a nibble board every good entree which I know you’re all waiting for Aon to come out and she’ll be here in a couple of minutes um you know she puts out five
Appetizers and off to the race as we go anyway um obviously we have to have we have to say thank you to a few people um you know we could not be here without the national writers series and we would not be here without seladon books so if
We can give up to them that’ be [Applause] great and for those of you who perhaps have not seen the show or don’t know who I am yes my name is Michael but I uh do respond to the husband I uh or as Martha Stewart said when she couldn’t remember my name after
Meeting me for the 10th time Mr lost kitchen which is fine by me because people show up in at freedom and they say there’s Mr lost kitchen and I’m I’m good with it and speaking of the Lost kitchen um one of the things that’s been interesting on this tour is to as we’ve
Gone all over the country this is now our our seventh or eighth stop um show of hands how many people here who have sent postcards in wow and how many people have had dinner at the Lost [Applause] kitchen thank you thank you for Mak so it’s it is possible though it’s possible it’s
Happens um anyway as you might imagine I I am beyond proud uh to be here to help celebrate the release of big heart little stove it’s been an amazing 10 years yes I took that Journey from Manhattan to Maine and I never looked back and it’s an honor and Aaron asked
Me to get up and and help with this and I couldn’t be more proud um before we bring them out we’re going to show you a little video that basically hope hopefully gives you a glimpse into what the book is about which is cooking with what you’ve got where
You are and cooking from the heart and and hopefully you see it as a guide to you know great great memories um on the back of great meals so let’s have a look at it hi everyone good evening evening I knew in the pit of my being that this was what I was born to do just me my 1992 for burner G Electric the best ingredients I could find and an overwhelming desire to fill people with a kind of warmth and joy that can only
Come from food made with love my heart hammered as I second guessed every everything who was I to play restaurant I knew that after years of feeling like there were no clear signposts in my life’s path I’d found the one that had mattered over time I
Was lucky enough to be able to share my passion with more and more people I can tell you with time tested certainty that it may be the promise of a good meal that first brings people in but it’s the intention to make them feel completely comfortable and at ease that keeps them
There long into the evening it’s the difference between people saying that was an amazing meal versus exclaiming that was an amazing night wheel got my M beside me too hey baby we’re going home hey baby we’re going home Texas was super loud all right we have one last announcement as of 7:00 tonight we landed we got to the hotel big heart little stove is number one on the New York Times best setter list let’s give it up ladies and gentlemen Caren McDonald and Aaron [Applause] French hi
Everyone wow hi I told Aon last week I was like it’s going to be a really good room so um I feel like we’ve already been swept up in a little bit of Aaron’s spell yes yes um hi guys that I’ve never been part of a literary event with a
Playlist and um when aarin mentioned that this was part of the intention of the evening I really started to get a taste for what we were going to be in for tonight and I think tonight we’re really in for a treat so um I wanted to
Jump right to it our time is going to fly tonight because Aaron has created so many things we need to talk about um but the way that I found Aaron and her work was through this beautiful Memoir finding freedom and as an editor and a writer like the fact that Aaron is from
A place called Freedom Maine and wrote this beautiful story of growth and Redemption um I was like she’s so lucky she’s from a town called Freedom um that just works and from anybody from Bliss is there anybody here from Bliss because we have a town called Bliss near by like
I grew up next to a town called like Thorndike which is not as pretty as Freedom so you know could have been that or you know Montville I’m really happy for you that it worked out um so so I wanted to start a little bit with your origin story
Because I know that a lot of us might be familiar with your food and your incredibly successful restaurant um but your your life story is is quite beautiful and very moving and a book um that was interestingly brought to me uh by a friend so I was in a very small
Independent bookstore because where else would you be and um we were looking and I was in my own Dark Night of the soul and my friend Amy who is streaming from Denver shout out to the 80211 um said have you have you read this book and I was like no haven’t and
She said I think you should get it and I flipped it over and I was like o this Marth the Stewart and yes an a garden and there was like but Tales of overcoming you know triumph over tragedy and and you know very some hard themes
And some hard times and I looked at her and I’m like that’s a nice book and I put it right back on this deck because it it didn’t seem like it might be the book for me at that moment and she said okay and walked to the register and she
Bought it and then slipped it in my bag so I did read this book at that time and it was the book that I needed cuz I’m sure a lot of you have had that moment where the right book finds you and there can be many books and you can
Love many authors but something about when you’re in a moment and something speaks to you you form a little bit of a connection and so that was my introduction to your work your recipes your worlds and I’ve embraced it more fully which will get to later but I
Wanted to start a little by talking about this beautiful book so um when you were a young girl when you were five your family took a leap that really changed everything can you start us off there MH so when I was 5 years old my my
Parents bought a restaurant and um I I think it was actually my grandfather’s way of my dad was getting into trouble he was just really having a hard time and my grandfather was actually a little brilliant because he said well I know how to lock you up for a while I’m just
Going to help you buy a restaurant and I think he knew that it would just be all consuming and it would just keep him out of trouble so I think that was the goal of it so at 5 years old I’ll never forget the moment of my mom taking
Us on the way to school and she pulled into the driveway and said you know hey we guess what girls we bought a restaurant and we thought that was the coolest thing ever because it was like all you could eat donuts and burgers for days and there was a soda fountain that
You could just fill up with drinks all day long and it was just like this is the coolest thing ever but then you start to realize that you know as you get older maybe it wasn’t because your dad’s never around and then you’re spending all of your after schools at
The restaurant and your weekends at the restaurant and then I got into working at the restaurant because it was the only way for me to spend time with my dad and you know for a while I um I struggled with that but I started to find a sense of Pride being there
Because even if I was just cleaning up eggshells I was being useful and he was noticing me and he was paying attention to me and and that really I think in that moment of that simple thing of cleaning up eggshells kind of just changed my life and the moment that he
Allowed me to throw something in the fry lator and actually you know make a French fry that went on a plate that went out to the counter that someone ate and I made that french fry at 12 years old felt pretty Grand so that’s when I got bit by the restaurant restaurant bug
And there was really no going back after that what I found very interesting is that this was a diner where the pace was just brutal right just kind of a grueling you talk about it um especially when as a young woman when you’re working and how you just get finished
With lunch and you have the satisfaction of the frier just simmering quietly and things are cleaned up and you’re just ready now and you turn around it’s time to prep for dinner um but there’s a very different kind of food that you were preparing at that time than some of the
Food that you’ve moved on to prepare but what I was really touched with one of the anecdotes in your book was about young Aaron trying to take over the side salad at the diner can you talk a little bit about that um you know it was a very
Basic menu the menu never changed it was the same menu for the entire time that I spent my life there and as I was finding myself on that line at the diner and feeling like it was a place that you were going to be stuck because the menu
Didn’t change and you were just like grueling and working these hours I I started to try to insert myself into the place and I remember this moment where I thought well I’m going to be like really cool and not serve iceberg lettuce salads tonight and I I snuck
Onto the The Cisco truck is there are there Cisco trucks out here is that thing okay I didn’t know if that was just a New England thing but you know it’s like not local food big tractor trailer truck pulls up a couple times a week and just unloads a
Bunch of food and um I I was smart enough to like hop on the list and like add in a couple bags of mcin like what is that and I was so proud when it showed up because it looked so different and so fancy to any of the other salads
We had ever made and you know I prepared the salads and and you know it got sent out to the counter and then I was so embarrassed because they all came back and all of the red lettuce was like thrown aside like there was no one at
That Diner who was coming to eat mesin they wanted iberg and I was not listening to my clientele very well but I was really trying to give them you know something nice but what’s fascinating to me and and wasn’t there like the case of like some neram that
Sort of was kind of landing on a lobster roll or something always I mean that was another way I was trying to you know constantly just put my mark on those dishes was whether I would run out to my mom’s Garden before I would bum a ride
To get up to the restaurant for my for my shift at 12 or 13 or 14 years old I’d pick some noers and I’ll never forget that moment of I started garnishing the lobster rolls with nosters because I thought people might like it I mean I
Don’t know and um you know I I remember because it was like I would serve a lot of these guys you know over and over again there were like some regular Farmers they would come in for breakfast lunch and dinner every day and we had so many regulars and I remember seeing that
Lobster roll go out and I was like oh he’s really going to love it he’s like you no yeah right and so something different today well well I remember the moment cuz I looked out and he was like really rugged guy and this lobster roll shows up and
He kind of bends down and looks at it and then just like a little corner just kind of smiled I had never seen him smile before so that was a really big moment for me that I had cracked a smile out of a guy that I had waited on for 5
Years and never seen him smile he took it and threw it off to the side but you know I was like he didn’t want anything to do with that but I I I got a feeling out of him I I brought I got some
Emotion out of him and I was like I felt really good so much to put a pin in that yeah um I have a stick there are so many sticky notes in this book it’s a tiny bit terrifying but um I spent the weekend in Aaron French’s head here uh
Thinking about how you just had that impulse to delight at such a young age that was really you know when you’re a parent and you’re a mom and you get this child and you’re like they just are who they are it seemed like something that was just that is who you
Are I I didn’t really know it then and it’s funny now because now I can look back and I think like all of the cues were right in front of me the entire time and I can remember being a 13-year-old girl and getting my first Martha Stewart magazine and I would
Collect them and I would I would take if you remember do you remember she used to have the perforated uh recipes in the back and there would be like four of them I would rip them out and I would collect them and I would organize them
And I would just and I I couldn’t figure out what it was that I was so drawn to whatever that language was that I was reading and you know now today I know it’s like yeah that’s the stuff that makes your heart Pang and that’s where you should put yourself into because
That’s what’s filling you up like that’s where your joy is but for me I I didn’t really know that and I really got to a point where I started to resent food and I started to resent the restaurant because of the time that it took away from my family which ultimately turned
My family into you know a pretty dysfunctional family because a restaurant can be very very challenging and I watched my father work these 17 18 hour days and come home and being absolute bear he was miserable to be around and I could also see myself that
You know growing up I was born in Freedom on a dirt road it’s still a dirt road there are still only 719 people and I I had this fear that I was going to spend the rest of my life in that Diner you know making lobster rolls and and
Frying french fries and that I would never be able to to give anyone more than just a smirk from an auram and and so I want I I if anything I wanted to run from it and I wanted to make my parents proud and I thought the only way
To do that was to do those things that you know if you if you’re a good girl and you’re working hard you’re going to be a doctor you’re going to be a lawyer you’re going to be all these things and you’re going to be perfect and and and that’s
That’s where your goal should be and I I really believed that that I had to escape to make something special happen you you describe in the beginning of your book you say when you talk about the mill the mill that is ironically uh the center of your
Universe and so many of us have now come to to look at with such fondness is um you said the Mills seem to embody the message if if you stay here you will rot MH yeah it’s a very it’s a it’s a very tricky town you don’t it’s not like you
See success stories or you see people leaning into dreams and freedom it which is ironic right for a town called Freedom you can only work it so hard right but I mean it so I I did I I threw myself into other dreams and other goals
In that belief that that you had to escape I mean if you grew up in the high school I went to it was like oh my gosh if you heard of someone who like got to New York you’re like they got out they got out how did they make it how do they
Get there how do they how do we do it where do we go where’s the exit and and it it just doesn’t happen for you know for kids like us and and you know and I did and I I fought really hard and I worked really hard in my grades and I
And I I got into college and I remember my mother telling me she said you know you have to you have to figure out what you what you really want in this world and and what makes you feel good and you should experience the city you know
You’ve grown up on a dirt road you’ll never know what makes your heart sing until you try these things and so we actually lied to my dad because I got a full scholarship to the University of Maine and um and then I I got into nor Eastern University in Boston and did not
Get a full scholarship and I was going to have to take out loans and she said rip it up don’t ever tell him because he’ll make you go there and and I you know I was like okay we’re going to do this I’m going to take out these loans
I’m going to go and I’m going to try this and it didn’t work out but you know I gave it a whir I you know I ended up unexpectedly pregnant I moved back home and the only thing I knew how to do was to go back to that
Diner and you know for me I found it a couple times in my life where food has truly saved me and I didn’t know it at that at that moment but I I really just I started to just you know tail between the legs and go okay this is where
You’re supposed to be you’re you’re back on the diner and this is the way it’s going to go and I really just leaned into that for a little bit yeah I love how just candidly you weave your story into all of your not not just your
Memoir but all of your recipes and for all of you who’ve already gotten your book and who have Aaron’s other cookbook at home you know how personal how warm but um the descriptions of love and security and food they kind of they they give me chills um you had your son you were
Struggling you were still working in the hospitality and food industry and sort of clawing your way like slightly better and different and starting to see things and um you ended up with a man who was so much older and I remember your description of being in his apartment and seeing like these gleaming
Hardwood floors and a beautiful rug an art on the wall and what you thought was if I lived this life my child would have re the good juice boxes and I would have organic fruit in a bowl that I could take at any time and
I was so just it just took my breath a little bit the way and it seemed so pure such a pure desire and you saw that through the lens of food as like having made it and being a abundant mhh you know it was a very challenging
Time in my life of feeling like I had been defeated and that I had to figure out a way to you know to survive and so leaning back into the restaurant and you know I got to a point where I I had learned how to cook at 12 years old and
I I could I could run the entire line of my dad’s diner by the time I was 14 which he loved because that meant he could go out back and drink all day long and you know but that taught me like I was I was cranking out all this food I
Was bouncing between fryolator and and stove and back and forth and you know it would just be me and a jammed up restaurant and four waitresses out front and dishwashers and I was making it happen so I had those skills at that point and when I became a young single
Mom it it was really like well now you have to put your skills to work because you have to you have to start to make a living now but I really struggled because I I couldn’t make a living as a cook because the pay was so little that I got into waitressing
And um you know waitressing and bartending or anything where I could make tips and and make more supplements so I could buy diapers and you know the kind of the beautiful thing about that was it started to teach me not just the cooking but the hospitality and that’s where I started
To get this full understanding of caring for people and not just making the food but serving them and watching The Joy on their faces as they enjoyed that food and and you know sometimes it was me doing it all sometimes I was making the food and serving the food and garnishing
It with the flowers and then really get to see their Joy it felt even better that I made the food and served the food and I’ll never forget the moment where I I actually I didn’t know there was anything but diner food until I was probably uh 22 years old because it was
We didn’t go out to fancy restaurants we didn’t do anything like that but I I got a gig at a catering company and I went to a wedding and I could not believe the food they were serving it was like beef wellington and like crab cakes and like
And all of a sudden I saw food as beautiful and that it didn’t just have to be fried fish baskets that you could actually do all of these other things and it opened up my mind to thinking of like well what if you could do more what
If I made food what if I made food like this what if I started to make beautiful food cuz now I have some you know I have these skills like what would that look like and you you know that’s really where I started to to kind of fall back
In love with food and and let it sort of like help me lick my wounds and say how can I pick myself up and how can I make a living but how can I make it a living that feels like delicious to me that I don’t feel like I’m just doing this for
Work but I’m doing this for Joy at the same time that’s when I really started to move in that direction to think like I’m going to stop running for food I’m running away from it I’m going to start just leaning into it mhm and after a certain period of time and and
You married and um you had a an inspiration and it came in the form not just of I mean I think of people who might come to this and say I have such a vision I I want to create a certain kind of food or a different kind of food and
It wasn’t necessarily that it was a space that caught you and you saw this brick building and said okay something needs to happen here and I think I know what to do well I was I was really in um I was in a really terrible relationship for a
Long time that I didn’t understand because I had grown up in a dysfunctional family and I thought that you were supposed to be treated that way so you know I basically married my father because I thought that you know that’s the way a relationship is supposed to be and I found myself just
Just feeling like boiling all the time because I could feel like I was supposed to be doing something I was supposed to be creating something and I didn’t know what that was but I I knew in my soul it was like it’s something with my hands
And I I I just I feel this absolute need and as I was turning 30 years old and I had completely lost my sense of self in this relationship that I was with and I was struggling to find like what is my purpose and what am I supposed to give
To this world I leaned into the only thing that I felt confident in doing and that was food and it was cooking and it was caring for people and it was serving people and so I said you know what I’m I’m going to go for this and I’m going
To open a Seer club and so I came up with the idea to start a supper club on a four-burner electric stove on the second floor apartment that I was living in and you know just ask people to to donate I I would work in a kitchen store
All week long so I could afford to pay bills and you know anything extra I would use as uh you know use my employee discount to buy cookbooks that I could thumb through at night and and look at recipes and on the weekends I would I would do these secret suppers where I
Would have total strangers come into my apartment and they would leave an envelope with any cash that they wanted to give for ingredients and I had no idea in my wildest dreams that it would ever turn into what it turned into today I I didn’t have confidence in myself um
And I I really used that as a tool to to have some self-discovery and figure out if if this is something that I could be good at and that I could just find some way to contribute and I had to beg 16 people to show up to my apartment on
That first dinner I’m sorry Are there women out here that would have to be big to go eat someone’s food I mean I got complaints he said why are we paying you to come to dinner at your house and I was just like oh my God
This is not going to work is it it’s not going to work the the story when you get to the and and you allude to it in other books as well but the story of like it is so you get your groove on when you
Get into the like and then I made this and then we’re going to get that and bringing the tables upstairs and the the what was like a burlap lookalike fabric that you found on the discount Shelf at the fabric store and and the thrifted silverware and you just you can see it
Just what struck me was so much of that your creativity was so multifaceted and it was so starving to to be expressed and you didn’t have hardly anything to work with and yet you just created because it’s what you had to do I I think it’s also very it’s very
Main um to use what you have it’s using your resources and what was around you and I didn’t have any money and you know sure I I at at the point when I realized I wanted to really invest my life in food I couldn’t invest in myself because
I had a young son and there was no way that you know my parents weren’t going to pay for me to go to you know college I was still paying off loans 10 years later and I um you know I there was no
Way I could you how was I going to go to school with my young son and afford that so for me this was a small and simple way to dip my toe into this and see if this was something that could work and I
Did I started it with you know I I made the tablecloths from scrap linen and and you know threw together some tables on saw horses and I went tag sailing and picked up dishes and use some of the hand-me-downs for my grandmother and and put together this dinner and I’ll never
Forget the feeling that I felt so high at the end of that dinner of those 16 people who did come and actually pay a little something to have dinner that evening of just exclaiming like they just had this most incredible night and I just I I left I was so invigorated
Like oh my God like I can’t wait to do this all over again and so the next week it happened again and I got like two more people to join so I was like up to 18 and then the next week I booked it out for 24 people and I didn’t know a
Single person who was in that room because it was friends of friends who had heard and showed up and you know before I knew it those suppers were booked out one after another and then I thought at some point I have to figure out what I’m doing here I’m either going
For it because I’m going to get busted because this is an illegal restaurant that I’m in my upstairs apartment so yeah yes so I went for it and what was the feedback you were getting so especially when you pivoted from that first like thanks for coming
Friends who know me slip your 10 bucks in the envelope um what was the feedback from The Stranger group what did you start to hear that fed because I think this bear is repeating if you don’t already know it Aaron does not have formal training um and goes up against
The heaviest of the heavyweights in The Culinary world with her talent and success but to not have been through that machine through feeling you know affirmed that way what was the feedback you were getting well you know that that’s the thing and as I as I think
About that Supper Club and now I now I think about my current restaurant and I have spent some wild amounts of time trying to demystify how the heck did it get here yeah how did this ordinary girl from a dirt road in the middle of nowhere with
No culinary degree no idea what she was doing Flying by the seat of her pants somehow end up with a restaurant in the middle of nowhere that is one of the hardest restaurants to get to in the country which sounds insane to me that it’s it it is it is so difficult there
Are very few people who will actually eat there because we just cannot keep up with the demand and as I have thought about it and put so much so much time and energy into it it is truly not just about the food that we are serving yes
Sure am I a good cook I am an okay cook am I the best cook in the world no I’m not you know and and we have people who come there for the best meals of their lives but we make simple salads we make you know very very oldfashioned Grandma
Desserts that are just topped with a dollop of whipped cream it is not groundbreaking food in any way but I think what it is is that we are serving people a feeling we are serving a moment and if you think about this I am so
Hesitant to ever call myself a chef I do not deserve that title I did not go to school it’s like calling a doctor a doctor without having a real degree unless they’re like delivering babies and fixing broken bones in which case it’s kind of like well okay like you’re
Doing the thing right but you know I mean I it still feels fraudulent and I you know I do I I constantly I think everybody needs to put a pin in that right there cuz Aon French feels fraudulent we’re all hosed um my knives are dull guys I mean
Okay I like it’s not great but it really was uh I I witnessed people coming into the space and and having these moments and and recognizing that it wasn’t just about the food sure it was simple it was delicious at its core it was Grandma food that really embraced you and made
You feel like you were having a hug but we were we were creating a a moment and a memory for people we were it was there was intention whether it was the dishes that we chose to serve on which weren’t anything special they were my grandmother’s dishes but they told the
Story whether it was the silverware that I picked up for a dollar a piece at a tag sale but I thought about those things I didn’t go to Craton barrel and just buy a set of you know all off the shelf the same dishes and they were
Exactly the same each piece that I thought about told a little bit of a story and it created a feeling for people and I love those moments when they would say my God this reminds me of my grandmother or this reminds me of this moment in my life and you know for
Me the beautiful moments in my life even in the dysfunction of the family moments there was food involved and food has that amazing amazing aming strength to to evoke feeling and we use food as an anchor to bring us to the table but the stuff that matters is all around it and
That’s really why we all come together so um It’s A Beautiful s right and that is a fantastic um segue into the cookbook but before we get there I do want to just bring up that you mentioned Tuesdays in your childhood were days that were on unlike the rest
Of the week because the diner was closed can you talk a little bit about that so my dad would close on Tuesdays on the diner and that was the day when you know the bear would become a kind person and we could spend moments together where he
Wasn’t just you know W wasn’t walking on eggshell around him all the time and we would just have the most delicious dinners and whether it was him like grilling steaks and slicing tomatoes on the back deck or grabbing a pot full of lobsters and whatever that was it was
Like everything was okay on Tuesdays because everything was a little lighter so there were those moments and again it brought it back to food like no matter how hard the week was there was always food that could be that s that could just make everything just a little bit
Better yeah um when I started spending some time in your new cookbook which is structured differently in a way to actually really acknowledge everything you just said about creating these moments and experience I was really struck by some of your words and in our conversation we had last week about
Creating moments and creating a mood and how cooking versus chefing versus being a restorator you know um it made me think of the way I explain my job as a writer and an editor I’m sort of like the the writer is the cook part and the
Editor is maybe the restaure part but um how many people here have ever made a super sexy mixtape for okay Spotify list anybody here right even just at the Jukebox like I’m working all across the decades here um but you know how or even requesting a song for some you’re you’re you’re not
Making the music per se but you’re creating this Arc and you’re creating a making a Vibe you got to make a vibe VI we didn’t call it Vibes then we were just trying to be cool but you’re trying to tell somebody you’re trying to express who you are but you’re also
Trying to Delight them and set in them a feeling hopefully that has a halo effect on you right but but you you know that the music and the things that you choose not just the choices but it was very particular that it was this song then this song then a little something else
And then this song right and I thought about that when reading your cookbook because really you structure it taking us through an evening tell me more about your decision to sort of go in a direction where you break it down for us by setting it and building that evening
Well here’s the first thing can we can we all just do ourselves a favor can we stop dumbing down the word host because I know that you yes it’s it’s a big thing you know we think about hosts we say you go to a restaurant you have a
Host you have a Hostess they guide you to your table they throw row down your menus you don’t see them again but I’m sorry I think a host is such a more important thing that I think I embrace deeply and I I want to see the world
Embrace host is a much more important being because a host yeah a host is a producer like we produce we make moments we make feelings we’re thinking about it from the beginning to the end not just dropping off the menu it’s like I thought about everything I put on that
Table I thought about the way the lights were going to be when you were there I thought about dimming them as the light as the sunlight went down I thought about cranking Up the Music a little bit more after you had two glasses of wine I thought about you know taking it down
When it’s time to get you out you know I thought about you know making sure you had a glass of something in your hand the second you came in while you were nervous as hell to make you feel calm I thought about putting down a nibble so
You could have something to you know snack upon I thought about serving you four desserts at the end just because you know why not you know let’s why to have one but like thinking about the Arc of an evening in a way that it is almost like a production and I have learned
That is being um a pretty good cook and a host at my restaurant is that you know that curtain goes up at 5:00 and it’s it’s curtain going up just means your guests are showing up and it doesn’t matter if it’s my restaurant or it’s at your home when you’re having friends
Over you are you have put thought and energy and so much into that evening and like Double Down On It Don’t Stop think about those flowers think about those details you are a host you are a producer and you are evoking emotion and feeling which is the most delicious
Feeling when you watch people have that wash over them and you know yeah there’s food involved too so you know I put on a you see how many sticky notes I have here so I put Aaron will control you but in a good way I’m not a control I just
Care deeply okay guys but just you’re a curator you’re a curator and I think as an editor you know that’s what we do too and we when we put together a magazine every month and it’s the same kind of a thing and we’re like we’re going to warm
You up with some heartwarming and short and surprising stories and then we’re going to take you into something deeper and tell you how to do something and then we’re going to hit you with the main features which is the Entre and and it really is a joy it is a joy to be
Able to create an experience like that for somebody that you know is engaged and wants to be there and I just want to say like this is a skill and a passion that is fighting to exist in a world of you know 8sec Clips well there’s only
One place that I can come from and there’s only one place that you can do that and you truly have to just have so much love in your heart and care so deeply and you know I know this because I work in a profession that is a little bit
Confused in the restaurant business you find there can be a lot of people who are cooking for a purpose and their purpose is I want to make a dish I want this dish to be the best dish I want this dish to win Awards and that is all
I care about bottom line end of a story and then you will find there are people in this industry who cook from a place because they are cooking because they want to watch The Joy on the people who are eating it and yes we’re making a
Dish and maybe it’s you know maybe we never even write the recipe down and maybe it’s a different dish another day and you know for me I changed the menu every day every week all the time it drives my staff crazy but you know we figure it out but cooking from a place
Of of being able to give someone this this gift that they are you know taking in and then watching that Joy like that’s cooking from a place of love and that’s where and that’s where you can really find your cooking shining so I’m going to tell you this if you are in a
Pissed-off mood just order pizza there’s can your guess with your Badness if you don’t pull yourself together but that’s what you talk about the intention you talk about like getting into I when you talk about hosting and Hospitality I don’t know if I’m the only person up here who loves
Food but then starts to sweat when I think about you coming to my house um and I had people at my house on Halloween and we were um I think I had just spoken to you maybe or I was about to anyway I was thinking about it a lot
And I had to make a meal and I served some frozen chili that I did not make that my mom made whoops lied about it lied about it you serve it Frozen no cooked cooked but it was frozen in a big Ziploc bag and she’s like pull it out
When you need it and I’m like I need it now and then I was like but this kind of is awful like I can’t just do that and pass off my mom’s chili which I did and I so I made a gingerbread cake um with my friend Joe Trader Joe
And I thought also better warm it will fill the house with good smell so that should be enough and then I was like I can do better because the tiny airon French in my brain was like eyes on this go go for it so I made um homemade whipped cream from a really
Good local like creamy Dairy you know got the glass jar at Oriana you guys know what I’m talking about the real like nine bucks and I whipped it and then I was like I’m going to put a little vanilla and some maple syrup in there and then I was like and maybe some
Grated orange and some ginger and then I was like stop you’ve gone too far too much but but it was like I felt really good and I was like y’all are going to stick around for dessert because I have this really nice whipped cream but don’t
Think about it too much you know here you go but that I was like okay I got it I got it because we need why are we so uptight about this though is it just me it’s are you kidding me I mean you I am a uptight every night my
My heart bur what makes you great though no I mean you the trick is you have just have to hide it but no I mean your heart should be pounding a little bit because if it’s not then you actually don’t care enough so it’s it’s a fine balance of of like
You know being like I am scared to death now here they come they’re going to be showing up and and and realizing like you know you’ve got it it’s going to be okay so worry is a really important thing like you should you should be nervous if you’re not and night when I’m
Like why am I not nervous I I start to get nervous cuz I’m like did I forget a course did I forget like like it’s all going to go wrong tonight you know very few nights when I’m not nervous and then I get nervous cuz I’m not nervous and
Then I should be nervous and then you know that’s part of being a host but Aon also says don’t overthink it so but do you also wrote I deliberately and devotedly made each of these selections and each of these dishes as if if it were more of an
Offering than a meal and I was like oh my God that is a lot of pressure but I see it though also very as an emotional like this is a gift to you and this is a way for me to express that I’m glad you’re
Here you know like I said also it is a bit of entertaining and I hate that word I need we need a new word for entertaining but you know being a host it it is a performance and there is supposed to be those bit of nerves and it can be excitement too it
Doesn’t have to be negative nerves it can just be like I’m excited and I’m nervous and my friend I hope everything turns out great and I hope I don’t burn the chicken and I hope I don’t you know I hope everything tastes perfect but you
Know the bottom line is if if you are doing your your host job and even if things aren’t perfect with the food and but you have thought about everything it’s so forgiving like it truly is like cuz the playlist will pick up for everything I mean yeah or the boo
Exactly pour more wine you’ll always be fine it’ll be okay and more dessert more wine you’ve got it you’ve got this yes I felt inspired um I what I love about Erin’s new book too is that there’s just a lot of layers of advice and like by
The way you can totally not do this or you could do this and put caramel in it or you could do something completely else go with it and it’s very encouraging it’s very so there’s like some tactics and tips but it isn’t overly um chewy in its like many steps
And stages and layers and techniques and it is very approachable and at one point and I may have been drinking a little wine when I wrote this but I think there was a vegetable dip in there and the only word I wrote on my sticky note was
Perfect but it was so because it was easy enough for me to do um but I noticed there’s also ingredients in here like bricks of cream cheese or wieser sauce or you know um your grandmother’s clam dip right and that that is 100% encouraged and okay always um here’s the
Thing about I mean My Philosophy on recipes are you have this book it’s a book of recipes that I put together that I worked on really hard but you know what it’s your kitchen and and it is supposed to be your food and and it’s all about just helping you find yourself
As as your own home cook and as your own host to find your own vision and your own path and you know if I could be a Guiding Light along the way to give you a few bits of inspiration like that’s my greatest joy but I will never forget
This moment in my life when when I started to recognize who I was becoming as a cook because I had had my first restaurant everything fell apart I had moved back home I was living in an Airstream I was picking up the pieces and I was starting my what is now the
Current restaurant The Lost kitchen which is now 10 years in now and I I remember that moment when and it was go time it was you know week one we were back in service and my team came back and a lot of them were women who were my
Friends who were my friends from the first restaurant and my friend Anna walked in and she was back to waiting tables with us and she turned to me and she said I’m so glad you’re back I have missed your food so much and I I was so
Like I I I was taken aback because I was like I have food and like I realized in a moment that like I didn’t even know it that I had organically created a style that I didn’t know that I had created and I started to listen to that and
Recognize like who was I as a cook what were those things that I was reading in Martha Stewart at 12 and 13 years old that were really just like touching me and and getting into my soul and now I know that is as my age now I feel those
Feelings now and I can recognize them and then I go ooh unlock that you know where before I had no idea I was throwing out those things left and right and thinking I was supposed to go over here and over there but it was all
Inside of me the whole time it was about just really listening to those bits inside of you and so I’ll never forget that moment of hearing that so I think that is so important for anyone who is trying to find theirself in their own kitchen to say like who are you who are
You as a cook what makes you feel so good inside and if it’s just putting an aerion on a lobster roll then like lean into that please find whatever that thing is that just you can’t describe and there may there may be no words for
It but you’ll feel it you will feel it inside of you and just ride that feeling so basically let the excitement be your guide Etc uh is that a Michael is that time is it time I mean you guys could go on all night I know we didn’t get to
Talk about chip and Joanna gains at all so I’m a little sad that’s okay we’ll do this again okay well then you’ll just have to come back to so we do get to do that and talk about all the great beautiful tips from from the back of the
Cookbook which if you haven’t looked yet it’s really amazing don’t miss um all the things like from your mother-in-law put your plates in the oven and serve your guests on hot plates um keep pruning shears in your car I’ve actually done this so you can steal other people’s flowers trespassing anytime you
Need you know just driving by hitting the brakes you like the looks of those tiger lies you get after that tiger so but we’ve come to the question portion of the show already this is amazing you guys are it’s awesome keep going I I have one last question it
Doesn’t seem to but does the fame of like we talked a little bit about this in the dressing room like people getting you they don’t just buy a cookbook and be like that’s a really beautiful cake recipe I’m going to do that which totally last night by the way I did make
The buttercake last night which I had for breakfast from scratch no girl from scratch from scratch and so much butter can maybe there’s groups for that but um and it was delicious and um it just left me with such a good feeling about my own um like I can follow a recipe and
I can do this with my kiddo and I can do that but I but I realized too like beyond that recipe there’s people here that are connected to your worldview to your outfit like the air in French Vibe which is a thing it just makes it easy
Getting up in the morning what are you weing CH your shingles your place it like you have an amazing uh your taste is amazing your creativity is beautiful so does it slightly freak you out that we are very interested in the whole of how you think and present creatively in
The world I I mean it’s endlessly flattering the fact I mean I I’m still it still amazes me that that people are interested in this because you know I I continue to be like what really like you like what I’m doing it tastes good it looks good and you it’s important to
Have those moments of balance of of of being like like you have to kind of think like I have room to grow because otherwise you think you’ve conquered it all so I am my biggest critic I doubting myself all the time and and that’s my
Space where I leave it just to like keep growing keep learning keep figuring it out on that note I’m going to get to our first [Applause] question we’re going to bring the mood down a little we’re going to go a little deeper into some of the philosophy here
Um Erin how many striped shirts do you own 32 hey when it works what advice would you give to someone who wants to start a creative business and how do you move through the fear and uncertainty feel like we went there oh okay um I mean don’t move through the
Fear embrace the fear and uncertainty is okay and it’s to be expected but I’ll tell you one of the biggest things that I figured out in starting my own way I started very small and I never took on anything more than I could afford and that included like I really started you
Know I started with nothing on a for burer electric stove in my apartment and CU I didn’t have that money and I slowly built up but really um again leaning into those feelings inside of you because people are going to come at you left right and Center
With opinions and I can tell you how many people told me it will never work you know this is the color you should paint the wall these are the bar stools you should get these are what the chair should look like this is the plate you
Should get and this is what the menu should be like and this is the music you should play you know you should play and I I just I thought about that vision of like you know if I listen to a an entire room full of people telling me exactly
What they thought it should be that would be a hodge podge of a place to go to can you imagine and and so I I started to just like slowly tune that out and say how do you see it like how does that cohesive thing look to you and
Feel what does that table look like what does it sound like what does it feel and that’s what I found people really responded to so it’s really about listening to your gut and tuning out most of the opinions so sometimes my guts like I’m just really anxious right
Now so would you say it’s like do you have this like is the emotion kind of excitement when you’re like that’s it that’s it do you just feel even if it’s crazy or it seems you know is that an excited feeling then or excited and nervous I
Mean there it’s a mix of emotions but I always always listen to my gut before my head and then sometimes they talk to each other and they check it and some sometimes it’s like I don’t think that’s a very good idea but this one’s like I’m overriding you on this one we’re just
Going to go for it so right for all the overthinkers out there Aon French ladies and gentlemen all right so um so related how do you silence your inner critic when you’re cooking uh or how do you handle impostor syndrome which I think we’ve danced around a little bit um I
Don’t silence it I listen to it I am constantly criticizing myself and constantly doubting myself which I feel is you know I mean sometimes I beat myself up which may not be healthy but I think there is that healthy dose like we talked about is is really questioning
Yourself and and and moving forward and that that really that really has been important to me to continue to think like I don’t know it all I have a lot to learn you have a lot to do and I constantly feel like an an imposter still to this day it’s just like I’m
Still like what how you know how is this possible because it’s still it is it has been such a you know a joyful ride for me but still can be like how but you know I I believe this for me I believe this for anybody in this room that you
Can be an ordinary person and do extraordinary things if you really just put your heart out there and you just unlock that feeling inside of you so it’s it’s there for anyone for the taking [Applause] I love that aarin what is your favorite thing to do in your offseason this is
From Jody in Oxford so she’s a Michigan girl and Welcome to our offseason it’s gross oh I mean you know it’s just ketchup time for me um you know seriously the restaurant being in the restaurant is really it’s very hard it it doesn’t get easier they are 17-hour
Days when we are in service and that can be so grueling and so it’s it’s really about catching up on moments to be with people I lost a lot of time with my son that I can never regain and those moments you can never take back because
He will never be that little boy again so um you know I love just having dinner with my family and sometimes shamefully and you know and unapologetically it’s watching Jeopardy on the couch together and I’m okay with that and you know just having those moments to be at home on
Evenings I don’t take any evenings for granted because they’re very rare around our house um this is from Liz and Mary who are sisters what is your second favorite ingredient besides butter thank you for reading yes um easy and terrible and I’m clearly dying at a young age but salt um
We were recently um I think it was in Texas um and we were you know doing the signing at the end and this woman comes up and she’s really quiet and she’s looking at me really funny like this and she’s like I need to talk you and I was
Like is everything okay and I thought she was going to be upset about something that I said in you know the show or something and she’s like I’m a nurse and and I was like yeah she’s like I’m really worried about you are you eating enough
Oatmeal I’ll get on that so okay there is a recipe in this book for Buttered bone marrow so yes I think we’re all a little worried um what recipe or meal you serve brings you the most Joy that’s must be a tricky one roasted chicken all the time um I
Love I love roasted chicken so just just serving that sitting down together carving a chicken and because then you get the whole moment the next day to make a nice soup with it so that’s a good that’s a good one it’s a twofer how do you determine wait I’m not
Sure I get this let’s see okay these are my people people are often nervous and over welmed by the idea of opening their homes um what are the somebody has nice cursive but I’m struggling here the the basics they need the something they need to overcome
Their fear what are the things they need to overcome their fear well we talked a little bit healthy dose of fear is okay but um really prep work I mean really just like having your prep work under control making sure your house is clean that’s always helpful um and just having
Everything so you’re not feeling like you’re frantically running around it’s really about creating something simple and just having your prep work in place so that you can just be chatting and and you know be be ready just be ready okay that’s a good somebody wrote in such pink marker here you’re such an
Inspirational person with such a beautiful heart and soul what is one thing you would tell someone to not give up and is inspiring and motivating women important to you um I can tell you I have had two very dark moments in my life and in those
Moments it was really hard to see that you could ever get out of them and there were some days that I didn’t know if I would make it through it and I can tell you that I I believe in this in all of us as humans that when we get to those
Moments which we all will life is not supposed to be the straight easy line which somehow we think we’re born and we’re supposed to be given that but we’re not and there are ups and there are downs and I think it’s so important to to recognize that the the adrenaline
There we have survival and adrenaline that lives inside of us and I have felt it come out in me twice in my life because I can sit here today and be like how did I have that strength and it only comes out when you know that you are you
Are in a very very dark place um and also believing like you never know and and trust me it may take a week it take may take a year it may take 10 years but if you continue to pour yourself into things that you love good things will
Come to you and and I I promise you I’m a testament of that of of just over and over again pouring myself into things and they will fall into place even if you think it’s falling apart it will fall into [Applause] place that’s one example right there that’s right I fell into
Place you fell into a good good place there was a it’s been great um I think there was one last question or do you have what do you got there um I feel like that’s a little repetitive is there is there an 8-year-old River in the house there do
Oh are you taking that one I just I’m just wondering if that person is here yes no well River had a question from an 8-year-old and I think there’s a actually a two- part of there were a couple different questions one was what advice would you give your 9-year-old
Self and so River’s planning ahead river is planning ahead and I was kind of struck by this that that River was thinking about challenges what’s the biggest challenge that you might have my 9-year-old self I wish I could have told her this you are perfect as
You are imperfect that you don’t have to be perfect you are perfect imperfect and that is just who you’re supposed to be so don’t anyone ever make you feel like you have to be that perfect girl and then the last question and I’m going to be interested to hear this
Myself can you please share something about you that we haven’t seen on the show did you come from I mean the other one was does Michael have a younger brother does Michael have an older brother you know that kind of thing but I thought what what what what do we have
Baby you should answer that question oh something about you that’s not is it that I swear a lot no that’s usually no that’s not you that’s not you you’re good I don’t know if oh man I got myself into a sticky one here see let’s put you
On the spot something about you that’s not on well the show is just you know surface stuff right but um we try to be as open and honest with who we are on the show as we are in real life so I think if the show had more
Time in the day you’d see everything but and more swears and more swears yeah more travel more more more downtime Adventures that kind of thing but anyway I I just can everybody just give it up for these guys what you see is what you get thank you so much thank [Applause] A all right thank you everyone Cara Aon we’re going to do something very special now which will Zoom around the world if you would hold up your book High over your head as we bring up the house lights sea roach our photographer is going to take a great wow [Laughter]
A thank you so much yes and Sean will tell you what to do we it yes perfect we go three two one and one more three two one awesome thank you so much now listen thank you we have uh the photo line will be forming in the lobby and as Anne said in
The introduction do be considerate take your picture but keep moving just cuz there are so many of us if you wish just to leave remember your book is signed you can exit right out through that door right there otherwise queue up in the lobby thank you so much we’ll see you
Soon thank you for joining us up next is Mystery novelist Nita Pros she’ll be at the city oper housee on December 6th her event is also live streamed we hope you’ll join us get tickets at National writers series.org good night